Tag: UIO podcast

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Staying Connected With Friends During a Crisis

New podcast series for teenage girls

It has been nearly six months since the Coronavirus started making its way around the globe. Wherever we are in the world, we have either been forced to watch from a far as if watching a surreal movie or we’ve been caught up in that movie, disconnected from our friends and relatives unless we live with them.  To this end, we released our Friendships podcast over a month ago with some great tips on how to stay connected.  Had a great opportunity to do a vlog of sorts (still not quite polished yet) on that matter.  Check it out here.

And if you haven’t had a chance to listen to How To Nurture Friendships During a Crisis with Sue Atkins, listen on Apple podcasts or wherever else you listen to podcast.

 

 

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Keeping Mentally Fit During the Worst of Times

Week two of doing a video blog. As the pressure continues to mount on countries and people around the world, UIO podcast continues, along side many others, to explore ways to keep safe and healthy. This week I look at keeping mentally fit. Of course, this a huge task for any of us, particularly those who have suffered loss and those who are directly suffering ill health. Still it is so important for all of us to join together and do what we can.

On that note, I am sending prayers and heartfelt hugs, even if they are virtual, to everyone everywhere, particularly our healthcare workers throughout the world. So pleased to join our neighbours throughout the country last night in applauding our NHS. Anyhow, watch my vlog on YouTube.

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The ESP Of Coping During Unprecedented Anxiety

Anxiety has been a big deal for sometime now in our world but with the uncertainty we are facing due to COVID-19, anxiety has hit new heights and become a pandemic unto itself.

This week, I have drawn on the resources of UIO podcast in a short vlog to suggest three general ways to get our heads around the situation, if you will.  Of course, heeding the advice of our experts (our healthcare agencies) is paramount for safety and well-being.  And as we do this, it is so key to stay well emotionally and spiritually, too.  Watch the clip on YouTube. 

Also, listen to UIO podcast on Apple Podcast, Google Play and Spotify as well as many other channels for more inspirational advice and hot tips on many subjects related to both mental and physical wellbeing.

 

 

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Finding My Voice

I am delighted to have guest blogger Zaqiya Cajee, the founder of SwopItUp, the clothing swop initiative in schools that is sweeping the country and giving teens a wonderful mechanism to do something about climate change. Check out what she has to say about finding her voice to get the word out about SwopItUp. And learn how to find your own voice for whatever it is that you are passionate about. 

While I had been feeling passionate about bringing positive change to the environment for some time, the first time I had the chance to speak out was in Feb 2019, and I’d just turned 16. I was at the Royal Geographic Society at an event on the impacts of Fast Fashion on the environment. In a lecture theatre room filled with attentive adults, the panellists had been discussing why fast fashion was bad, listing many of the problems (e.g. carbon emissions from production & water use from intensive farming practices), but not focusing on solutions, which really surprised me.

As I sat petrified, my heart practically beating out of my chest, I knew I had to push past the nervousness and let them know that I had a solution. I had to make everyone aware of SwopItUp, my clothing swop initiative in schools, that I believed had the potential to grow nationally or even internationally, keeping huge amounts of clothing in use for longer.  This would be teens tackling one contributor to climate change at scale.

And then I raised my voice, told the room about SwopItUp, and asked the panel for their ideas on how to get more people to engage with it.

Amazing result! It was so worth it, the rush of adrenaline I felt having spoken up,  and afterwards when I had people coming up to me congratulating me and networking with me.  This was a massive reward. SwopItUp was gaining momentum.

Next up was an invitation to speak at a parents eco event at a local secondary school. This was only a small crowd, but I started to learn my presentation style, and understand how to make it feel comfortable for me. I spoke for much longer this time and had some slides to support me, and the questions and feedback that I got at the end boosted my confidence even more.

In August, it was time to step in front of the camera. I wanted the world to be able to hear my message directly from me, so I set about creating a 30-second video explaining SwopItUp,  and highlighting our goals for the future. I uploaded it onto social media and was delighted with the response.

Importantly, it attracted the attention of the Head of Markettiers, a Broadcast PR agency in London, who offered to help me spread my story. They got me radio interviews on many stations, such as the BBC and Love Sport Radio among others.

Coming face to face with skilled journalists and in one instance, one that was a climate denialist, gave me opportunities to really make my case.  I can’t say it was all smooth sailing but I was prepared to fight back, of course, in the most diplomatic way possible.

From this, I’ve gone from strength to strength including being on panels (like Sustainable Fashion Festival), contributing Blog features (including this one) and addressing groups at Universities.

Upon reflection, I have come to understand that finding your own voice can be broken down into four simple steps:

Step 1: 

Determine what your passion is.  It needs to be something close to your heart. What is it you want to speak about?  Do some research on the topic to find similar people and events in your niche.

Step 2: 

Gain support.  This includes from friends and family but also find events in your niche, particularly ones where you can listen to other people present, but use the opportunity of question time to use your voice. This worked for me, though it took a little courage.

Alternatively,  network with other people at the event afterwards. This is a great way to learn a thing or two from the speakers but to also start to gain a little confidence in a low risk environment.

Step 3: 

Do a presentation to a small group on the subject that you are passionate about.

Step 4: 

Consider how to get your message out to a wider audience whether through the use of social media or through the networks and contacts you have already made. Don’t be scared to involve adults to make things happen for you, they are great at opening doors.

I have no regrets about taking those first steps as it has helped me to find my voice and to gain momentum for an organisation that I truly believe in.

So now it’s up to you to start on step 1 and make things happen. I wish you the best of luck.

Follow my journey on Instagram @zaqiyacajee.  Comment on my recent post and include #findingmyvoice so I can follow you on your journey in finding your own voice, Zaqiya x

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What You Say To Yourself Really Matters

Self-talk has a major impact on who we are and also on who we become, whether the talk is good or bad.  What we say to ourselves has a lot to do with our self-esteem, our self-confidence.

This truth hit home for me recently when I had the horrible accident with my middle right finger, an experience which taught me a lot about my character.  See my blog of January 31, Drawing On Unknown Character Strengths.

Anyhow, to make a long story short, my finger was stuck in a garage door for about 20 minutes, putting my entire person under great duress. And all I could think when that door clamped down on my finger was how stupid I had been to use my hand to try to manually close the door. 

What a weakening thought, which made me feel useless and hopeless, and certain that I would lose my finger all for being stupid, but thankfully, the good self-talk overrode and pushed the menacing thoughts back. It was an accident, the part of me who knew we needed strength to overcome, pointed out and from there,  my confidence to survive the trauma with my finger intact rose greatly.

In our podcast, UIO: Your Confidence Inside Out Cheryl Grace stresses the importance of positive self-talk not only when in a pinch but also on an ongoing basis. To this end, she mentions encouraging herself daily with self-love while getting dressed. 

I love this idea and though I am not disciplined enough to employ this tool every day, there are plenty of days when positive self-talk makes the difference in a good day or a bad one. For example, the other day when I had to get through some work that had lots to do with numbers (a budget for UIO), the negative self-talk got in there first (while I was getting dressed) and reminded me that I was really quite bad at budgeting, thus it was going to be a really horrible day. Why didn’t I just put it off for yet another day or not bother at all.

And just as I was giving in to the chiding, it suddenly occurred to me that though budgeting is not my thing, I am actually not that bad at it and I am married to an accountant who is more than willing to help out with the spreadsheets, the bit I really don’t like.

With this self-talk, I felt myself perk up and as I headed to my desk, I looked forward to getting the task off my plate, a very different feeling to dreading a task. It is done, though the spreadsheet is still hanging. Never mind.

Also, in the podcast Your Confidence Inside Out, Cheryl points out the importance of not saying things to yourself that you would not say to a friend.  A great rule of thumb for self-talk indeed. If a friend had called me up and said my finger is stuck in a garage door, there is no way I would have called her stupid, even if I was thinking it. The point is the nurturer kicks in when it comes to being encouraging to others. This same nurturer needs to stay close to self at all times, on an ongoing basis, if you will.

So, the next time you get the urge to tell yourself how stupid you are or how unflattering you look, think again. And remember that your self-talk has the ability to inform your experience, your day, your life.

In UIO: On Personal Development, Robyn Spens points out the importance of not only believing that you are enough but telling yourself as often as you can.

This rule stands even when you are down. So instead of focusing on the downside, focus on the upside.  As for me, though I am still going through a slow healing process, the upside is that I have my finger, which rightly or wrongly is tied to my confidence to do a lot of things—one of them  is writing.

Thank goodness for positive self-talk. Check out our podcasts Your Confidence Inside Out and On Personal Development for more tips on the matter. Both podcasts are available wherever you listen to podcasts.

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Keeping It Safe On The Internet

For this week’s blog, I have adapted our October 24, 2019 entry, as it is still as relevant now as it was then and with so much emphasis on staying safe on the internet this week, it makes sense to reflect.

Here we go….  Lots to be said about internet safety. Our  podcast featuring Charlotte Aynsley, e-safety pioneer and expert,  sheds a whole lot of light on the topic as do many other platforms.  Last year, I attended an inaugural lecture of a law professor at King’s College, London, who talked about the importance of Internet Regulation the world over.

But here is the thing, is the message really sinking in, particularly with our teenagers?

After all the Internet is the global hangout, full of wonderful opportunities. What could go wrong? Back in the summer of last year, I actually heard a young boy say something to that nature—why would it be on the Internet if it is bad—and according to On Internet Safety guest Aynsley, this child is not the only one who thinks that way. There are many children growing up believing that everything on the Internet is true and right.

Though this might sound naïve, it makes a whole lot of sense to the young person whose internet experience is all positive until it isn’t. In the UK, the legal age for having a social media account is 13, though about 24% of children have accounts when they are 10 and twice as many when they turn 12.

A few years ago, a hysterical acquaintance shared that her underage daughter was asked to undress over the Internet.  But thankfully it was all curtailed before any damage was done. But what if it hadn’t been stopped.

Sadly, everyone’s story doesn’t have the same ending as my acquaintance’s daughter had, and mainly because few teenagers are aware of the emotional and mental impact that sharing sexually explicit images can have on them, their friends or others or that sexting, as it is called, is criminal if you are under the age of 18. 

Admittedly, this issue is not being policed as strictly as it could be, Aynsley points out, but all the same, consequences can lead to emotional and mental unrest and cause dire consequences for the future.

Another top issue that holds problems for teenagers online is body image, which impacts  girls disproportionately. The pressure on them to be perfect and happy all the time, as told to us by our two teen girls in On Being A Teen Girl Now, is magnified on social media.  Through polished selfies, this aim for perfection goes well beyond looks and enters how our teen girls are feeling about themselves.

Hence the rise in mental health issues amongst this age group. The key is education, Aynsley says and points out that transparency and honest and real life role models and experiences are of paramount importance.

And this honesty doesn’t just rest with the teenagers themselves, it has to live with parents and guardians, social media companies, the government, the police, everyone.

Staying safe on the internet, which can be a wonderful place, requires a joint effort to not only be aware of the problems stacked against us, particularly children and teenagers, but also be willing to tackle the issues.

The good news is that our podcast clears up the confusion around these tough topics and offers teenagers and their guardians practical tools and tips on the matters.  Listen to On Internet Safety on Apple podcasts and other platforms where podcasts are played.

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Exciting Beginnings: Embracing Yourself for a Happy New Year

This morning while waiting for a prescription I overheard an elderly woman ask with reticence, “Is it really 2020?” The middle aged female pharmacist smiled and nodded and touched the lady’s hand lightly, as she signed whatever was before her.

I couldn’t help but smile to myself, having had similar thoughts now for the last nine days. Is it really  a New Year. Where has the year gone? What does it all mean?

Lots to think about, yeah? And sometimes the thoughts can get crushed or twisted amid the the hype and celebration,  which almost always focuses on resolving to do something or other.

Admittedly, I have never been big on the hype and pressure around making New Year’s resolutions, not because I am a kill joy contrary to some belief, but because I tend to be more of a realist than an idealist.

Instead of focusing on kicking all the bad habits that I have acquired over the year or resolving to fix something in a few weeks that has taken far more time to break, I tend to enjoy  the flavour of the New Year, rather than to get bogged down in the pressures of it.

I have always thought there was something exciting about a new beginning, something which encapsulates the tenderness of youth, something which holds promise and therefore, refreshes and invigorates the spirit. And New Years and Birthdays both have such characteristics.

And though I have spent every single day of this year thus far with a horrible head cold,  I am somehow feeling refreshed and ready for the excitement ahead, not only for what it means for UIO podcast, but also what the new beginning means for teenage girls.

Last year, we added six new podcasts and interviewed some amazing women on the key issues including empowering girls and we are looking forward to getting out even more stimulating, timely and relevant podcasts this year. Also, I watched stories come in from near and far about girl power, how many of you are excelling in sports, academics and activism and so many of you laid the foundations in 2019 to take on new challenges and influence change for years to come. And that is just the beginning.

Just think what you will have accomplished by the end of the year. I am thinking about what is ahead for UIO, too, but let us not  think too long and hard: let’s keep it moving.  Otherwise, we’ll  be asking ourselves the very question I started this blog off with: Where has the year gone?

Thankfully, it’s only just begun. Forget about those fleeing and self-defeating resolutions. Embrace yourself and have a Happy New Year. For more inspirational advice, check out On Girls’ Rights with Lindsey Turnbull.

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Tuning Into Your Thoughts For A Good News Story

After more years than I care to admit to, I finally made the connection between food and physical health, though it took a few intolerances to convince me. Yet I still haven’t quite gotten my head around food for mental and emotional health, which has more to do with thinking than anything else. Of course, real food can muddle the mind, too.

But let’s face it, our thoughts do play a major role in our emotional and mental health. One article that I read years ago puts it like this: thoughts are stories that we tell ourselves or that someone else tells us about ourselves.

That’s all good as long as the stories are all good. But when it comes to emotional abuse, the stories can cause health hazards, even if they appear to be good stories. Radio personality, Jillian ‘JJ’ Simmons, guest in our latest podcast, On Emotional Bullying, says that sometimes emotional abuse masquerades as love.  When her emotionally abusive boyfriend would often ask her to stay home, preventing her from going out and seeing friends and loved ones, she told herself his request had to do with love.  Although he wasn’t going to be at home with her, he would tell her that he wanted her to be the first person he saw when he returned.

In a healthy mind, this logic breaks down rather quickly but in a mind that is under the spell of emotional abuse, it makes perfect sense, even if it is telling a bad news story. I can relate. Though I can’t say I have had a similar experience, I have had tricky situations that have consistently caused me emotional unrest, leading to wear and tear on my self-esteem and keeping a negative story alive.  This stuff is not in your face but it is in your mind, even if you can’t see it.

JJ points out that you have to be on your guard and recognise emotional abuse for what it is. Name calling, taunting, controlling and so on all fit the bill. One of her hot tips for self-protection is to take care of yourself at the core. This means working on your self-esteem and ultimately knowing who are. In addition, she says it is important to watch what you feed your mind. Easier said than done, right.

Actually, it is as simple or as complex as watching what you feed your body.  As much as I love croissants and cinnamon rolls and the list keeps going with pastries, I have been gluten intolerant for years now.  Admittedly, the first year or so I would remove all gluten from my diet for about three months at a time, most of the time before a holiday, and then on holiday I would eat whatever I jolly well pleased and pay for it later. 

Though the physical discomfort would come, it was tolerable and then one day, it just wasn’t anymore.  So now I don’t focus on the foods that I used to love, regardless of consequences, I focus on the ones that love me sincerely. And you know what, I am healthier and happier for it.

As for my food for my thoughts, I’m getting there.  Key to my journey is tuning into the narrative that I am feeding my mind directly or indirectly and also recognising what really is emotional bullying and what is not.   Of course, there are healthy disagreements and different ways of life between friends, acquaintances and family members that call for healthy resolutions. That’s a fact of life.

For more hot tips and tools on how to protect yourself against emotional bullying, listen to On Emotional Bullying with JJ Simmons on our website, iTunes, Soundcloud or wherever you listen to podcasts. Meanwhile, tune into your thoughts to ensure your own good news story.

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The Voice Of Teen Girls Matters

Having a voice matters throughout life and sometimes it matters more when you are a teenager. In our podcast On Being A Teen Girl Now, our two guests stress the importance of being heard and understood, not only in family life but also in politics and other places where decisions are made and life is shaped.

We take their point and continue to work hard to advocate on behalf of teenage girls and bring them resources that lift their individual and collective voice. To this end, we are gearing up for the final three podcasts in our third series, focusing on three hot topics that teenage girls face today.

One of them is sleep. Surprise, surprise, surprise!  I was anyhow until I did my homework and had a wonderful conversation with sleep expert, Dr. Nerina Ramlakhan. Listen to UIO: On Sleep on October 9th for the real deal on what sleep has to do with wellbeing.

Not only does Nerina give us the inside scoop on how a good night’s sleep can address physical health problems, but it can do a a thing or two for mental health too. The mother of a 15-year-old daughter, this expert talks about the importance or role modelling, negotiating and working together for a better night’s sleep.

Next up is UIO: On Internet Safety, out on October 23rd.  As experts ramp up on how to keep our children safe on the internet, we had a brilliant conversation with Charlotte Aynsley, a pioneer in internet safety.

Though the biggest safety issue on the internet has to do with body image for teenage girls, Charlotte underscores lots of other concerns and points out ways for teens and guardians to work together for the overall better experience.

And the last podcast in the series delves into a topic that plagues teenagers disproportionately, particularly girls due to the pressure on them to be perfect all the time, as pointed by our two teen girl guests in On Being a Teen Girl Now.  Yes,  you guessed it: social anxiety.

Though a very common disorder, social anxiety can go undiagnosed for years as it did with our guest, award winning mental health blogger, Claire Eastham, who points out that getting a diagnosis is so key to managing and overcoming. Yet, another opportunity to team up with parents and guardians to share concerns and get the necessary help. UIO: On Social Anxiety is out November 6th.

Stay tuned for exciting upcoming series, and in the meantime, check out On Being A Teen Girl Now wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

 

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Taking The Time To Care For Yourself

Though the summer holidays are in full swing for some, they are completely over for others.  Regardless, it doesn’t feel like there is anytime to slow down, take stock of where you are in life.  Whether it is now figuring out what to do with your A-Level results, SAT scores or vocational achievement, the intensity can linger.

The thing to remember, however, is that very things are urgent! It doesn’t hurt to take some time to digest big news, big achievements and what might feel like big failures. They are all learning opportunities. Last December, on the heels of our On Personal Development podcast, I published a blog about taking advantage of down time.

And though you might be as busy as ever and feel anything but down, though heavy with decisions to make, those same tips might be just what you need for a spot of personal development, if you will.  Here they are:

1) Start the day on a positive note with some form of meditation. For me, that means a prayer. For others it might mean a session of mindfulness or full meditation.
2) Keep it moving physically. Walk, run, find some time to do exercise from right where you are.
3) Eat foods that serve your body, not ones that are going to depress the mind and the body further. As Robyn Spens points out in our latest podcast, On Personal Development, go for whole foods. As much as I love croissants, the difference in my mental and physical capacity is amazing when I pass on them, any gluten.
4) Reflect upon personal goals. If you are on track, that is amazing! Look at ways to stay on track but don’t put too much pressure on yourself. If you are not, ask questions, loads of them. What are the hindrances?  “You can do anything you want but not everything at the same time.”
5) Take up a new activity. Ever fancied learning to draw or even knitting. Such activities require quieting the left side of the brain, the chatter box, and just letting things flow naturally.
6) Catch up on your reading and your UIO podcasts. Stretch the mind, use the imagination to live beyond any mind traps that keep you in a negative space.
7) Write it all down. I highly recommend keeping a journal as many of the guests from our UIO podcasts suggest. Doing so gets your thoughts down and also teaches you loads about yourself.

When all is said and done, if you do these things and others that serve you in developing personally, there will be less time to worry about what university to choose and so on.  The important thing is working on developing your full potential in the space you are in. And if that is coming to terms with a different university to the one you planned or preparing to attend the one of your dreams, remember very few things are urgent.

Take the time to take care of you.