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Keeping It Light in the New Year

Imagine hoisting a rucksack over your shoulder and walking into the New Year with it, only it. Is it too heavy, too light or just right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know it’s a few days late for such advice, but bear with, if you will.

Now sit at your favourite table, desk or on the floor in front of the fireplace, wherever you are most comfy and cosy, and sort through the items.

Umm, how did this get there and what about that? You don’t need them anymore, do you? In fact, you probably thought you got rid of this and that a long time ago. I know the feeling but we needn’t worry. It is never too late to dispense of the unwanted tangibles and intangibles, too. The latter often weigh more than the former.

I should know as a few years ago I had one frozen shoulder after another. Medically, it was chalked up to carrying too much physical weight but psychologically, I was likely carrying too much emotional weight, too.

Thus I am pleased to say that I left excess emotional baggage in 2014, even if I do have to remind myself now and again, and some physical weight too. On that note, just before Christmas I had a clearing of some coats, more needed by others than me, and some clothing and some shoes. And truly felt lighter for it.

So, let me see what is left in this rucksack that I really need.

 

  1. Wonderful, I see my Nike Fuel Band is here, despite the best advice from the Sunday Times Style magazine. So yesterday, they say. Never! For me, it is still very much today.
  1. Thank Goodness, my Cloud Nine hair straightener (curling iron) is here. Not that my cosmetologist approves of us amateurs brandishing any straighteners, but let’s face it, it is better to have one with heat controls than one without. Not having one is not an option, at least not for me.
  1. I am thrilled to see my Mac liquid eyeliner. I happened upon this jewel while getting my make-up done professionally last year and I’m hanging onto it for a while yet. The size of a big crayon, even a novice could handle it. Go figure!
  1. Oh no, my Stella McCartney round shaped blue sunglasses are not here. Okay, so they are truly yesterday, not because of style, but because of wonkiness. Happily, however, in the January sales I found similar ones from The Row. Long may the look last.
  1. So glad to see my Ipad 3 here, even if it is a bit on the heavy side. I still feel lighter for it.
  1. Thankfully, there is my Anya Hindmarch satchel. No wonder the rucksack was a bit heavy. But who needs a rucksack when they have this bag.

There, that’s about all the tangibles that I really need, save for a few odd bits here and there, but surely they’ll fit into the bag, too. As for the intangibles, that I am keeping, that is, they are fairly light, too. In other words they are wonderfully bright.

Oh, and Paul has reminded me that I brought him, too. After all, someone has to help me keep it light. Anyhow, my satchel feels just right now. Off to living well I go.

So, just what did you bring into the New Year, that is, that’s just right for you?

 

 

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Considering 2015 For The Sake Of Old Times

So what were you doing when 2015 arrived? Not surprisingly, many of us can answer this question without missing a beat, whether we were sleeping, partying or perhaps praying. After all, the coming of a New Year is a momentous occasion.

As for me, this year I gathered with a group of Happy Brits at a quaint hotel in England’s Peak District and as the clock struck midnight, we kept with tradition and joined hands and sang Auld Lang Syne. As I sang cheerfully, suddenly I got thinking about the song’s meaning. What does it all mean? Are we pledging something here and will we honour the pledge, even if we never see each other again? Thus, I turned to Paul and popped the question.

 ‘For old times sake,’ he answered, ‘in gist.’

What a relief that I hadn’t made a commitment to my new acquaintances but the singing had stoked memories of days gone by with old friends. How I longed to reach out to them, in that moment, to reminisce. So I attempted to whiz off a few, select text messages shortly after midnight. Normally, I send out many well wishes as I wish everyone well, but this year as I considered Auld Lang Syne, I was selective with a view to add special meaning.

Sadly, the mobile service was lousy so I had to send an email instead via a spotty Internet service and as such misspelled ald, so frustrated. Never mind. If you were a recipient of the my short Happy New Year’s wish, forgive my typo if you will, and accept my extension of good will, good health and so on for the New Year, for the sake of the cherished times we have shared together.

And for those special friends and family who didn’t get my message, blame it on technology. In the meantime, interestingly enough, I have sang the traditional Scottish song many times on New Year’s Eve and must have known that its author, the treasured Robert Burns, had not written exactly the world famous song that New Year’s celebrators sing today. Other Scottish poets before him and perhaps afterwards might have had a hand in it too – the debate goes on.

Still, Auld Lang Syne is unequivocally Scottish in its wording, its title in gist meaning ‘for the sake of old times’. And its meaning of remembrance and goodwill, whether sang at New Year’s, graduations and so on, has global notoriety. Check out the lyrics here.

So for old time sakes, I sincerely wish each and everyone a Happy New Year!

In the meantime, just what were you doing when the year’s changed hands? Post your messages here.

 

 

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Eight New Years Renewal Tips

Whether you are twenty something, fifty something or an age somewhere in between, your goals and aspirations are likely wide-awake about now, maybe even keeping you awake at night. Not surprisingly, another New Year is on the horizon.

Hence the hype around New Year’s resolutions: everybody should make some to ensure a good start to 2015, right? Not to mention all the things that should happen on New Year’s Day, including special foods to eat, etc. Wrong, I don’t buy into any of it, not really. But I do believe a New Year is a wonderful opportunity to refresh one’s life.

And in doing so, it doesn’t hurt to have a few pointers, not only handy around this time of year, but also any time the sense to renew presides. Here we go:

 

 

  • Don’t get caught up into what you should do. Each person is different when it comes to dealing with love, loss and life. There are great tips and practices for getting over a break-up, for example, and for losing weight, too. But there is no one size fits all formula. The key is to move on in the way that is best for you.
  • Stay in the moment. This means letting go of past hurts and pains. For example, if not having children causes upset, focus on what you do have. Otherwise, you’re trapped in the past.
  • Govern your thoughts. You will need to do so consistently, certainly, to enjoy a positive present. For example, if you’re holding a grudge, let it go. Otherwise, you become a victim or a prisoner. Both ways of being are irresponsible. Go ahead take responsibility.
  • Understand the difference between experiencing emotionality and feelings. According to some experts emotions are toxic. Here! Here! They are simply repressed feelings that have not been expressed. So the next time that you respond ever so emotionally to something, anything, recognise that there might be more than meets the eye. Experiencing true feelings, on the other hand, is safe to do so. You are able to express differences without a dark cloud hanging over the matter.
  • Re-learn to love yourself. Sounds easy but not necessarily so. Loving one’s self means taking gentle care, both physically and mentally. Often this means saying no to unhealthy relations, foods, etc. For example, if you feel unimportant a bit too often, rely on the love within. And once you tap into it, you will have a better chance at loving others healthily, too.
  • Give! This doesn’t necessarily mean writing out a check to a charity of your choice or anyone else for that matter. Not everyone can but most of us can give a smile, kind words, a helping hand or even a good attitude to family, friends, work colleagues, etc.
  • And learn to receive, too. Giving people are often the worst receivers and without knowing can make their givers feel rejected. Receiving is as much about acceptance as it is anything else. So this year when a friend or family member compliments you or gives you something, accept it, and accept them.
  • And lastly, be patient yet persistent. Once you begin to feel re-energised in different aspects of your life, remember that it takes practice to form patterns, ways of being. Take it one day at a time, even moment by moment, which is all any of us have anyhow.

Refreshing realistic, yeah! All there is to do now is to just do it – one experience at a time! Happy New Year to all!

 

 

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Breathing Through The Holidays Easily

Niagara Falls is breathtakingly beautiful, even when it is cloudy and a bit wet.  Refreshing, isn’t it.  In route to the US for Thanksgiving, Paul and I had the opportunity to stop off in Canada and visit with good friends and also see some of the natural beauty of the country, such as the Falls.

What a wonderful opportunity to slow down, somewhat, and catch  my breath, which got me thinking about the art of breathing, if you will. Although breathing comes naturally, thank goodness, too often we lose sight of how important it is to breathe slowly and deeply, which might require some skill, that is, if we have lost touch.

Without skill and practice, our breathing often goes on a high-speed treadmill with the rest of life, even more so during the festive season. Not to panic, however, I have just the thing for getting off the fast track and reconnecting with your breathe.

Check out my latest Huff Post blog, hot off the press, just in time to breathe through the holidays. Have a nice and easy Christmas and New Year, too.

 

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Short Story Featured in National Sunday Magazine

Story featured in Love Sunday
Story featured in Love Sunday

More good news for ‘moi’!  On Sunday, November 23rd, Love Sunday magazine ran an adaptation of ‘The Coloured Girl’, one of the eight short stories featured in The Seasons, my latest release.

Titled ‘Guess who’s coming to lunch’, the story unravels the thoughts and actions of high society English woman Isabel Chiltern, as she meets her only son’s new girlfriend, who just so happens to be African American. Surprise! Surprise!

A modern day twist on ‘Guess Who is Coming to Dinner’,  the piece can be read here in pdf format by clicking on the jpg to the left, and of course, the original can be read in The Seasons, available now on most online book stores.

Thanks to Internet shopping,  there is still time to purchase the collection in time for Christmas. Love Sunday is a part of Sunday People, a member of the Trinity Mirror Group.

 

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In Oz After Being in Hometown Parade

 

After a three-week absence from home and work, I feel a bit like I am in Oz, but am hoping that I will find my way, perhaps more expediently than Dorothy did in the Wizard of Oz.

Lots of work overdo, including reporting the fantastic news that one of my short stories, The Coloured Girl, adapted as Guess who is coming to lunch, was published in Love Sunday, magazine of the Sunday People, on November 23. A paper of the Trinity Mirror Group, the Sunday People has a wide readership.

How about that! Watch this space for the pdf of the story, in case you missed it. Think of it as a Christmas treat, if you will. But still, there is time to bag The Seasons for Christmas or gift it. So I am told it is a fast and exciting read. Actually, I think so, too.

In the meantime, I must take the opportunity to publicly thank the Leary, Georgia, Christmas Parade committee for inviting me as their special guest this year. As Grand Marshal of my hometown’s Annual Christmas Parade, I had the opportunity to speak at a breakfast and lead the parade. Equally as exciting, I interacted with both familiar and unfamiliar community members. How very exciting.

It was an emotional yet fun event for me as I rode through the streets of the small town, remembering Leary when I was a youth. Like most small towns, Leary has had its ups and downs, evidently so in the population and other areas. On the upside, the town now has a library and yes, yours truly has three books in it. How about that!

Appropriately, after the parade, there was an opportunity to sign books. Many thanks to those who visited and supported!

Again, thanks to the committee and everyone who came for sharing your day with me. Having been back in the place where I grew up, if only briefly, I learned a valuable lesson about holding on to who you are, even if it means letting go of the past, so often necessary to spring forward.

Now to go forth and find my way through Oz; wish me luck in meeting the old Wizard, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Celebrating Different Types of Friendship

As far back as I can remember I’ve had friends, whether they were the kids next door or cousins living in a nearby town. In any case, friends are a huge part of life, whether we are young or old or somewhere in between.

“I feel like true friendship (is not to dissimilar to marriage) where  through the ups and downs, a commitment is in place for the duration,'” says my BFF.

So, so, so true, isn’t it? Still, sadly some friendships don’t last, aren’t necessarily true friendships perhaps, at least not forever. They come and they go, depending on the situation. For my latest Huff Post blog, I reflect on situational friendships, what they are, the importance of acknowledging and celebrating them and then letting them go and allowing them to rest well in the history books of life, your life.

And in the meantime, celebrate those lasting friendships too, even if it is only now and again. After all, it is the effort that counts when it comes to sustaining a friendship, the conscious effort that is. Read more here.

 

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Poppies Appeal to Millions at Tower of London

Today, November 11 marks Armistice Day here in the UK and Veterans Day in the US. Both holidays, if you will, honour those who have lost their lives in the many battles fought over the years and celebrate the retired and present service men and women who represent both countries.

Here in London, thousands gather at the Tower of London to admire the sea of poppies on exhibition in the moat. Constructed to commemorate the centenary of the outbreak of World War I, the installation began on 5 August and will be finalise today with the last ceramic poppy planted at 10.52, totalling 888, 246 poppies altogether.

Though the extraordinary exhibition, created by Paul Cummings and staged by Tom Piper, will be dismantled starting tomorrow, more than 4 million visitors from around the world are projected to have seen it when it is all said and done. Fortunately, Paul and I are amongst them.

Last Friday, after seeing Speed the Plow with Lindsay Lohan, (alright if you ask me but not great) we caught a taxi to the Tower and joined hundreds of other late night viewers, to enjoy the exhibition under floodlights.

So popular during its final weeks, the Mayor lobbied to extend it to no avail, but instead the organisers agreed to keep it illuminated at night. Though I had suggested we go early Saturday morning, Paul thought it would be wise to make the trek at night.

It was well worth it—the poppy exhibition, that is. For Londoners who haven’t seen it and are willing to brave the crowds, I can highly recommend. As for the play, I wouldn’t bother. But the extraordinary poppy display is hauntingly moving, even if under giant spotlights.

In the meantime, let us celebrate and honour our men and women of service on both sides of the pond, on this special day, and always.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Female First Remembers First Novel

Hardly seems three years ago that I wrote my first novel, The Barrenness. Recently, I was explaining to a friend how long it actually takes, at least me, to write a novel or a book. While it might look like I have churned out three books in three years–on the contrary.

As I have said in many interviews, it took me six years to write The Barrenness, considering the entire publication process and perhaps that long again to finish The Blindsided Prophet. As for The Seasons, each short story has been written and rewritten more times than I care to share. After all, the only draft that matters is the final one.

Anyhow, recently in celebration of launching The Seasons, I had the opportunity to talk with Lucy Walton-Lange of  Female First about my writing process, and reflect particularly on The Barrenness. Read the interview here.

In the meantime, find out more about The Barrenness, if you haven’t had a chance to read it and read an excerpt here. Like The Blindsided Prophet and The Seasons, The Barrenness is available in both paperback and e-book from most online retailers. Enjoy!

 

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The Seasons Officially Out Today

I have always wanted to create a coffee table book and though I haven’t quite cut the mustard yet, The Seasons, my new collection of short stories, comes close. Exciting!

Filled with eight intriguing short stories, the collection is sleek enough to compliment any coffee table, but also rich with good reads. Out today officially, The Seasons is available in ebook and paperback from Amazon, Barnes and Nobles and other online retailers. Not only a great Christmas gift idea, the collection is also a great read for a cool autumn day or a cosy winter one. And it’s just the thing for a short train ride.

Umm, think I’ll take mine out later today. In the meantime, have sneak preview right here.